Wednesday, September 7, 2011


 My brother, the only male sibling I have, is now a person full of warmth and cheer. I believe strongly  that he now can accept my ways and my thinking especially about love and family bonds. We have differences at the personal level and at the family level, but I persevere and took care of his "whims and fancies" the best way I know how. I could feel that we now can talk from our hearts and we can joke and laugh together like we know that true love can transcends any behavioral boundaries. I am grateful that Allah alMighty grants upon us the wisdom to see things in His perspective irrespective of our social standing. He now talks to me about Iman and Taqwa and sms me every week about the meanings of the verses of the alQuran and the Hadiths.

I am younger  by 4 years and we went through different channels of education and social upbringing. He was in a boarding school, at the Royal Military College and I grew up in the village  and the school I went to is no where near the status of his elite school. That was the beginning of the drift  and the beginning of the melting away of the family bond. By the Grace of Allah,  Eid Mubarak this year has healed  the difference and we are now making up for lost time.

 With my grand son and his grand daughter.

Alhamdulilah, being closed to my late mother and father I learned the wisdom of  life which my brother missed as he became an officer in the Army right  after graduating from the Military College and lived away from home after his marriage. The social fabric and environment is completely different and our social values are far apart. The  military culture after the nation's Independence is one which was  alien to me and to the family. We do not want to be judgemental but  my brother and I could not see things in the same perspective and my mother felt that  she has lost his son in terms of care and affection.I could never point fingers at whom to blame but myself because I did not have the social skill  and nor did I have the "spiritual"  power and endurance to steer the way to a more conducive setting to bring loved ones together.

But all is well that ends well, and on this gracious  Eidulfitri  morning I erased the not-so-sweet memory of the  past and  promised myself to continue nurturing the family bond  for now and the future. May Allah bless our family and may our family bonds grow even more sweet  and more harmonious.

With my nephews, and niece- in- law.

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