Friday, March 5, 2010


We could be addicted to life in many different ways. Some get addicted to work, some to reading, some to vices like alcohol,  some to drugs but some are simply  "addicted to children".

This is an addiction of  a different kind. When I was working my legal adviser is one who is simply addicted to her daughter, her first born. She said it herself. "I'm addicted to my baby and I must go home during lunch just to cuddle her, even if its for half an hour,"

Wow, wow,  I used to tease her. But who cares, and she would hurry to the car park so she didn't have to waste even a minute. My nephew is another who would agree to outstation work abroad, or attending courses if it doesn't last more than two weeks or so. He was born and bred and attended university education here at home. But he never  crave to go overseas if going overseas mean leaving the children behind. Personally I thought  that was a little too much, but who could argue or reason with an addict.

Now that I am 63 years old and looking back at the days I brought up the children, I must admit that I was not an addict the way my nephew or my legal adviser was. Perhaps many mothers are like me, but in those days it was easy to get good nannies to really care for our  children.. And I had a local girl to be 'everything' in our family until the children are big enough to take care for themselves with minimal supervision.

Right now I observe my children and how  they care for their children. I think in many ways they are like me, not addicted to children, though I must confess that my husband and I are addicted to our first grandson. But since these days we seldom can get good nannies, how I wish the are addicted to their children. How I wish my daughter and son in law would "berulit" more with their children before they grew out of the need to "berulit". I wish the same for my  son. My daughter in law is full time home-maker and has a different way of caring and loving the children.

They may say that children comes before career. But the balancing act is never easy. I may have the wisdom and benefit of hind sight, but how I wish my children would be wiser now and hopefully  may not have to regret anything later. Time is the essence. May Allah give them the guidance. Amin.

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